The below excerpt is taken directly from the book, Apologies From a Repentant Christian, page 33-34.
"...I thought about the worst day of my life weighed against the worst day of the life of Jesus Christ. I compared each aspect and felt heaviness in my chest. The night Jesus was arrested he was abandoned by His friends. In His agony, He was left alone. The night I was arrested, God rushed family and friends to my side to console me.
Jesus suffered accusation by a whole multitude. My husband stood alone in his accusation against me.Jesus’ trial was travesty. My case never even made it to trial. Instead, the charges were quickly dismissed through a hearing held in an official courtroom with a lawyer who advocated for my innocence.
Jesus suffered humiliation from others who spat on Him and mocked Him. I was shown great compassion by a jail officer who sweetly said, “You are going to get through this.” Jesus’ back was marred with lashings, while I only felt one bruise on my back. From the large, ugly Roman nails, Jesus suffered permanent wounds to His hands, while I simply felt numbness in my thumbs for a couple of weeks. Soldiers divided Jesus’ garments and cast lots, while I was offered blankets to warm me. Jesus carried the emotional weight of all of my sins on his shoulders. I didn’t even recognize I was a sinner before my arrest. In His innocence, Jesus suffered. In my guilt, I was shown great mercy!
I am amazed at how much God loves me! One day, I began to think, “Why was I forgiven when Jesus was condemned? I am the sinner. I am nothing. Why does God even love me at all?” I had known about the choice to accept God’s only Son, Jesus Christ, into my heart from an early age and I was too proud to receive this gift. Sadly, it took a great fall for me to finally reach up for help. Even so, God was there to pick me up and offer the gift of His Son once again. The feeling of gratitude towards God in sparing me the consequences I truly deserved overwhelms me.Yet, He continually affirms His love for me.
One day, while sitting in church, I drew a happy face on my five-year-old son’s hand. Under the happy face, I wrote, “Hi Travis.” When I was finished, he smiled. He asked to use my pen. He then placed my hand in his lap and began to draw on the top of my hand. I glanced down and noticed my son was drawing a similar happy face. I figured he would write, “Hi mommy,” on my hand. However, under the picture of the happy face, were the words, “God loves you.”My eyes filled with tears. I said under my breath, “I love you too, God!"